Robert Wayne McVicker's Obituary
On December 6th the world lost by all accounts, a first-round hall of fame great guy. Robert Wayne McVicker was known by a lot of names; Pop or Pops, Popa-Dukes, later shortened to just Dukes, Old Man or most lovingly Old Turd, Grandpa, Wayno, or just Wayne. He left us here to figure all this stuff out, but knew we would make it through. While he may no longer be here with us, we hope to keep his unabashed spirit, his love of life, and his giving to a fault nature, alive to remember and honor him.
Wayne was without a doubt the strongest person we will ever know. While his physical strength may not have won any world’s strong man competitions, those who knew Wayne, know the strength of his character was unmatched. Given a lifetime of stinking piles of bad luck, Wayne would never mention his streak of unfortunate rolls of the snake eyes. He was willing to give anyone more than their fair shake. He was an all-around amazing person. If there is a legacy to be left to carry on, this trait will undoubtedly be the one to make him smile.
Wayne’s adaptability and strength kicked in as a teenager. Living on his own at the age of 15, he relied on what would become his life-long friends to get him through. Moving into an apartment and strapped for cash, he became a small business mogul, selling recreational herbs to cover his rent. Known as the party house, “you could stay the night, if you paid rent”. Many times, he would later exclaim his bewilderment as how they managed to survive those years. Stories he would recall of jumping off the edge of the quarry, one hundred feet below to the water’s surface. Hitch-hiking hundreds of miles in the snow with no shoes up-hill undoubtedly in both directions, somehow bending the laws of the universe. And so many more.
In 1985, at the age of 27, the first of many of life’s challenges Wayne would ultimately overcome; a swimming pool accident paralyzed him from the chest down. While learning to adapt to his new challenge, Wayne continued to be a positive pillar of strength for his family and friends. Hard work and an endless supply of positive motivation towards adversity was the foundation of his strength. Spending a lot of time at “Woodrow” rehab hospital he regained his momentum for life. Graduating with an accounting degree and his full strength back. He was ready for the next challenge.
The biggest hurdle beyond the accident was a stable living situation. After spending some time with loved ones, he would involve himself with what would eventually become an enduring passion for him. But in 1998 he applied for an apartment on Progress St. in Fredericksburg. Securing one of four apartments, Wayne was given “so much more than an apartment, it was life sustaining” he would later recount, in his spotlight piece for the Free-Lance Star. In 2004, he moved into a single-family home on Charles St. While at home, never losing his love of classic rock, Wayne would have the radio at full blast, with the walls rocking and the house shaking. Everyone could hear the lyrics from the street. His son Dallas helped him wire up at one point an absurd number of speakers. 12” Vintage Cerwin Vega floor speakers, with newer floor speakers next to those, with several box speakers around those. All trying to achieve the proper mix of highs, mids, and lows with the knob set to full. We don’t have time to talk about the set-up of double bass tubes and amps in “Beefcake”.
Over time, Wayne saw an opportunity to help others like himself. He partnered with Jesse Franklin to purchase and renovate properties throughout Fredericksburg to make them accessible for people with physical or intellectual disabilities. He joined the board of the non-profit group Housing Opportunities Made Economical or H.O.M.E. Inc. The main office used to be near Princess Ann and Pitt St, and through the years, you may have seen Wayne in the downtown streets of Fredericksburg in his wheelchair shifting the speed setting from “Turtle” to “Rabbit” on his commute to work. For 23 years, Wayno’s handi-capable attitude allowed him to build H.O.M.E. Inc to include up to 47 rental units throughout Fredericksburg and Stafford. His tenacity, hard work, and dedication have helped hundreds of people live an independent life-style despite their physical or intellectual disabilities.
Many years, births and good times followed. Through the years, a loving Father, Uncle and Grandfather he would be all while giving and taking an unimaginable amount of sass. If you have spent any time around him or us you know if we are not cussing you then something is wrong. Wayne was no exception to this, as he would give you a vicious side eye that would cut like a knife. He would always threaten to “Come over there” but we knew it was an empty threat because even on rabbit setting, he couldn’t turn fast enough to catch us. Because of that, we gave him one hell of a good time.
Shortly after moving into the apartment on Progress St, a small family tradition started to develop where we would meet on Sundays at Pop’s for dinner. His daughter Jaclyn and he kicked things off, when she would go by and visit and help him when he needed. What started off as a simple dinner for the two turned into something much larger than anyone had anticipated.
Sure, things started out a simple cooked meal or some take-out/delivery, sharing a pizza and Mt. Dew, or just hanging out and watching “Band of Brothers” but it quickly grew into a full-blown weekly tradition. This would eventually turn into the hottest ticket in town. Sons, daughters, nieces, nephews, grandchildren, cousins, uncles, you name it, they were welcome. Many BBQ’s, Spaghetti dinners, Sam’s Pizza and Subs, KFC and an occasional healthy meal were had. The main focus of these precious moments was always laughs, fights, food, chalk drawing, football, music, and time well spent. Boy, did we have some good times. Sunday dinners at Pop’s will certainly be something we will never forget.
Wayne lived independently in downtown Fredericksburg until his untimely passing. He hosted Sunday family dinners, birthdays, Christmas Eve, and Superbowl Sunday. His home was consistently filled with people he loved and supported. Pop was the anchor for his family and friends. Always willing to listen, provide sound advice, and be a shoulder to lean on in times of need. When speaking to his family, friends, co-workers, and community acquaintances, everyone loved Wayne. In his children, he instilled family first values, kindness, a smart mouth, and a need to help others.
He will be sorely missed and survived by his children: Jaclyn (Jac) McCormick, Dallas (Little) McVicker, and Kathryn (Beanie) McVicker, his brother Doug McVicker and his wife Kay, His Sister Virginia “Ginny” Ratliff, and brother Ray Cannon, his grandchildren Jaden Woodward, Ashlyn (Boogie) McCormick, Millie and Mason Hall, and lastly an exhaustive but non-the-less loved list of Nieces and Nephews.
In order to continue his aversion to funerals, we will have a “Celebration of Life” ceremony held at Found & Son, 10719 Courthouse Rd, Fredericksburg VA 22407. A viewing will be held from 9:00-10:30 AM Thursday, December 16, 2021 followed by a funeral service at 10:30 and travel to Oak Hill Cemetery at 11:30.
The family also encourages everyone to wear their Favorite Team Colors or Washington Redskins colors in honor of Wayno. For one day only, rival team logos will be permitted. Black attire is discouraged.
In lieu of flowers, mail donations to HOME, Inc. at 1907 Charles St. Fredericksburg, VA 22401.
What’s your fondest memory of Robert?
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Share a story where Robert's kindness touched your heart.
Describe a day with Robert you’ll never forget.
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